I do! Now What?
by Puppet Kisu
Summary: [Anthology] [AU] Overprotective Cousins & Fathers. Deranged Older Brothers. Flirty Younger Sisters. Proposals. Marriage Counsellors. Surnames. PMSing Wives. Oblivious Husbands. Babies. Morning Sickness. Weddings weren’t always joyful. [SasuSaku NaruHina]
1. SasuSaku, Mr & Mrs

**Title:** Mr. & Mrs.  
**Author:** Strings of a Puppet  
**Pairing:** SasuSaku  
**Genre:** Humour/Romance  
**Disclaimer: **I do not own Naruto.

* * *

"What?"

Perhaps it was the sudden gust of wind that made it difficult for him to hear but she knew that wasn't the case. He wasn't a genius for nothing and (no surprise) had excellent hearing. So naturally, it bothered—on the verge of **annoying—**her that he would dare to pretend he didn't hear her statement.

"You heard me, Sasuke." She continued throwing kunai while watching him stop his movements from her peripheral vision.

"No."

Her grip on the kunai tightened and she whirled to his direction. She tried to keep her anger under control, but it was widely known she had one of the worst tempers of all Konoha. "You can't prohibit me!"

And he knew exactly what the consequences of vexing her temper were, (some multiple bumps on Naruto's head still haven't completely healed) yet he either decided to ignore it or was really stubborn himself. "That's stupid. You're defying law and tradition."

Sakura's eye twitched. "No, I'm being independent and _altering_ tradition," she said loudly.

"You're still defying the law."

"I'm the Hokage's apprentice! She'll understand!"

Sasuke softly sighed. He only proposed to her less than three days ago and was already starting to feel the pressure. Not that he would admit it aloud. He was an Uchiha! ...But he could only imagine what she'll do on the actual wedding day. He mentally cringed.

So what was the cause of this argument? No, it wasn't anything related to the preparations of the wedding (hell, they haven't even started talking about that part) or anything like that. It was something that didn't even cross his mind because it was what all future married couples do! What part of that didn't she understand?

"What matters is the children have your name right? I'm just the child bearer," she haughtily stated as she threw the kunai at the target.

Sasuke watched it hit a couple centimeters from the red circle. Her aim was (extremely) off today. "Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what? I just want to be independent!"

There she goes with that whole feminist crap again. It was a childish rebellion on her part, which began a couple of days ago and he hated it. Who knew the Godaime was so influential on Sakura? If anyone was to blame, it was Tsunade. Why the hell would she teach Sakura how to destroy large objects with just her forefinger? (He unfortunately was the last to know of Sakura's true strength and was not prepared for it at all.)

Simple, it was to keep suitors away! Tsunade was not going to let her prized apprentice ruin her kunoichi career by wasting her time with the opposite sex.

Then again, she failed miserably at that when Sakura accepted his proposal. However, that didn't stop the fifth from giving her all those 'inspiring' speeches to Sakura, some to which he overheard and resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

Furthermore, people kept complimenting on Sakura's immense power, certainly causing her feminine ego to rise at unbelievably levels. It was so annoying; more annoying than her constant talking. Usually he would tell her to shut up or completely ignore her childish antics, but that was before he asked her to be his wife. He wasn't going to risk having a broken arm with an effortless touch of her pinky. Then there was the fact that he was going to spend the rest of his life with her, so he had to find a way to either avoid (how ideal) or confront this new behavior of hers.

Her refusal to take his name as her own was incredibly idiotic. Not to mention controversial (his parents would be turning in their graves), humiliating (it will only give the village more reason to scorn his name), and a tad bit hurtful to his pride...

...Hell, it ENORMOUSLY poked at his pride. Kami, she used to be a fangirl! And even after those dreadful days, he could've sworn he occasionally heard her say, "Uchiha Sakura," in her sleep during some of their missions. She wasn't as obsessive or insane as Yamanaka or Karin, who would say it each time they inhaled a breath (how he wished they would choke and die), but the way Sakura said it was sort of...well it made sense.

As he thought, he began to see the real reason for her change. He watched her take several shuriken and launched them at the dummy to their right.

"There's a reason why I chose you."

She didn't turn to look at him as she scoffed. "My perfect chakra control? Inhuman strength? My uterus—"

He interrupted by nearing dangerously behind her. She felt his presence immediately, forcing her to turn and look up at him. Her apple eyes had changed over the years, but there was still some of the old Sakura faintly swirling in those pools of green. He made sure he had her complete attention before speaking.

"So everyone will know that you're _mine_."

Her jade eyes widened in surprise as a warm, fuzzy feeling coursed throughout her body. She had frozen at his statement. And she blinked repeatedly up at him before gaping rather stupidly.

He smirked at her expression. "Close your mouth, Uchiha Sakura."

* * *

**_And our crazy anthology begins!_**


	2. NaruHina, A little more than FLUSHED

**Title:** A little more than FLUSHED  
**Author:** Sakuraxkisu  
**Pairing: **NaruHina  
**Genre:** Humour/Romance  
**Disclaimer: **I don't own Naruto. OOC-ish + random. Plenty of "colourful language" (at one point).

* * *

"Where could it be…?" Nineteen and a half year-old Hyuuga Hinata inquired, her tone of voice clearly conveying her desperation and anxiety, as she picked up another one of the floor length, pure silk, designer wedding dresses; the fabric was soft against her fingers.

"Hinata, go see the dressmaker if you can't find it!" Her best friend and sister in law, Hyuuga Tenten, yelled loudly, her chocolate brown tresses dishevelled from searching through the living room-big wardrobe of various dresses.

"Hai," Hinata murmured softly, before leaving the room, shutting the door with a soft click.

"But, Hinata, the guy is an absolute perv, so be careful!" Tenten continued, unbeknownst to the fact that she was talking to thin air and looking like a crazy woman for talking to no-one.

Hinata felt chills tickle her rather petite body and cursed inwardly for not bringing a jacket, or at least something large to cover her clothing.

Currently, her cheeks were tinted with red, mainly because of the fact that she was only wearing a translucent white, pure silk negligee that came up to just about a few inches about her knees.

Her arms were wrapped around her thin waist, dark jet black tresses naturally tinted with midnight blue highlights moved about stiffly, as she took soft steps. She didn't want anyone to see her in her current attire, and by "anyone" she meant her father – he already didn't approve of their marriage, so…if she saw her in this state, he would… she didn't even want to think of the outcome.

Her teeth chattered softly – they really should've had the wedding in autumn, instead of now, in the freezing month of November.

'Winter,' She thought, putting an end to her once relentlessly chattering teeth, 'I hate winter. I hate that my birthday is in winter.'

She quickly pushed aside the thoughts of hatred, as she stopped in front of the door to the second room of wedding dresses, where the dressmaker would be.

She had heard rumours that their dressmaker was….well, slightly perverted (though at the time, the "victim" –Tayuya-san, Hinata cringed upon remembering Tayuya's habit– had yelled rashly "Slightly is a fucking understatement! That fucking perv shoved his fucking hands up right up my fucking shirt! Next time I see him, I'm 'gonna fucking give that fucking bastard a fucking piece of my fucking mind so that fucking bastard will fucking understand my fucking pain, that fucking…" and from there, it trailed on into a swear rant).

She took in a deep breath, and just as her hand touched the smooth surface of the wood, the door moved open, making Hinata jump slightly.

The door was pushed open softly, as Hinata peeked into the room, with a curious look on her face.

However, as soon as she heard a few noises, her curiosity (and slight, SLIGHT tendency to pry) got the best of her and she walked into the room.

Only to be shocked by the sight right before her eyes.

There, the dressmaker was, crouched on the ground, head up one of the Vera Wang, sleek white dresses.

"Oh my," the man murmured, before letting out a sleazy giggle.

And the worst thing was, the dress was on a MANNEQUIN. He wasn't even molesting a girl—he was molesting a mannequin.

(Though he'd probably just say he was fixing the dress, but Hinata knew better).

Hinata was horrified—her cheeks were scarlet red, and she immediately ran out of the room, before she could see those small grey eyes glinting suggestively, or the trademark long dishevelled grey hair, or better yet, those red lines from his eyes to his chin.

She shut the door with a slam, and leant against the door, breathing loudly and raggedly, her blush of embarrassment intensifying by the second.

"That did not just happen, That did not just happen, That did not just happen, That did not just happen…." Hinata chanted softly to herself, breathing loudly, as she walked past a few more of the same, white coloured walls and doors.

She could already feel her anger rising—it was like she passing the same row of doors again and again, like she was in a never-ending illusion.

And that's when she had had it; she chose one door at random, grabbed the handle and twisted it impatiently, pushing the door open roughly.

However, as she stared at the sight right before her, she knew things were...becoming too freaky for words.

There, on the ground, appeared to be Hanabi, dressed in Hinata's white Amy Michelson wedding dress. However, she wasn't on her own.

On top of her was none other than her "good friend", Konohamaru. And HE was dressed in a sleek, dark Calvin Klein tuxedo, which was a bit too familiar for her liking. And, that wasn't even the tip of the iceberg—Konohamaru appeared to be kissing Hanabi.

Konohamaru was kissing Hanabi.

Konohamaru was frenching Hanabi.

Konohamaru was frenching Hinata's little sister.

And he was molesting Hanabi as well. And both were moaning a bit too loudly and…sensually for her liking.

Hinata was horrified; traumatised; scarred for life at the sight of her little sister and Naruto's biggest fan hitting it off in her and Naruto's wedding clothes.

'Oh crap, Naruto!' Hinata thought, as her silver eyes darted around the room quickly, desperate that Naruto wouldn't come into the room and see her in the clothes (or lack of) she was preening.

(Last time he saw her in a see-through shirt, she nearly slept with him, AND fainted about 5 times).

However, it was too late for her to hide—she saw Naruto's back and stared.

…

…

Her face was ruby red, wide silver orbs glittered from the overload of bad images she was getting in her mind.

There, before her, was Naruto's bare back, tanned and muscular.

Her eyes began to examine from the head; his hair was dishevelled in a rather sensual, almost sexy manner; she kept on getting this strange sensation to touch his bare back, and feel the muscles move beneath her hand in a sensual manner, whilst her hands would move down…and down…and down…and down until they were in the…

Ooh…

Her blush deepened just at the thought of touching his gluteus maximus.

Which was currently clothed in a bright, mustard yellow boxer, with the words "HOT STUFF" imprinted in bold, vivid orange.

This also made her blush darken.

His legs were tanned and muscular looking (and though she had an urge to touch, feel his legs, the urge to feel his back was much stronger)….

And, just as the bad thoughts continued to pile up in Hinata's mind, Naruto turned around.

Brilliant timing (!)

What caught Hinata's eyes most about Naruto, was the image of a bowl of ramen, with steam rising up from it, on the exact spot where his…ahemMANHOOD would be located.

(This also made her blush more, and think about just how hot he was).

However, she wasn't the only one surprised.

Naruto's vivid sapphire eyes widened, glinting with surprise and shock at the sight of his "no.1 fan" and Hinata's little sister "getting it on". But what shocked him even more was Hinata.

'I've never seen such a dark shade of red….' His thoughts were completely changed, as he saw what she was wearing, '….fuck….'

He decided to skip examining her face and began at the chest.

And, just as he began to examine her chest intensely, one of the straps of her dress fell down her shoulder ever-so-innocently, revealing the strap and a small bit of her baby blue coloured bra.

Naruto's face turned the colour of tomato red.

His gaze lingered around that certain area, before travelling further down, staring incessantly at her smooth, milky-white thighs and legs.

His cheeks turned a darker shade of scarlet red as thoughts came rushing in.

(He was getting so many bad thoughts at once, that at one point he considered taking her right there and then, next to Konohamaru and Hanabi. But then he thought against it, because there wouldn't be enough space for them on the floor and he never really did like to rough it up.)

Hinata, on the other hand, was completely shocked from Naruto's intense staring.

(Her woman's intuition was already telling her that she wouldn't get away without fainting a few times).

And, just as Hinata was caught up in her thoughts, Naruto decided to strike.

He strode towards her, taking long steps (courtesy of his long legs), before pushing her to the wall softly but forcefully.

He placed his calloused hands tightly on her shoulders, and two lips came crashing down on Hinata's pale lips.

She was shocked and her mouth was opened to sound an inaudible gasp. However, Naruto took this to his advantage and literally forced his tongue into her mouth, moving roughly against Hinata's.

She, on the other hand, was as red a tomato, heart hammering against her ribcage so fast and vigorously, she was so sure it was going to fall out.

Hinata shakily placed her arms around his neck, steadying herself, as his lips continued to move against her animatedly.

She couldn't help but squeak when she felt his hands move up her legs, and his lips move from her lips, to breathe soft, quick kisses from her cheek to her jaw-line.

His hands continued to squeeze her legs softly, the feel of his oven-hot hands against her cold-as-ice skin sending chills throughout her body.

(He really was hot stuff!)

("OW! Konohamaru, you told me you were experienced in making out, so why did you bite my tongue—OH MY GOD HINATA-NEE-CHAN!")

("Gomen Hanabi-cha—NARUTO-NII-CHAN?")

She let out a desperate moan (desperate for him to stop, or her sister would spread it to the whole population of Konoha – she wasn't known as "the nightly leaf" for nothing) from the impact of his fox-like teeth biting into her skin.

'God, his teeth are sharp,' Her mind mused, as the sounds of two loud crashes, one happening after the other, made her ears perk up.

Hanabi and Konohamaru had fainted from seeing how far Hinata and Naruto had gone.

That's when Hinata screamed as loudly as she could.

'Naruto groped me….?' Her mind panicked, as those words replayed in her mind.

Naruto groped me.

Naruto groped me.

Naruto groped me.

And, by the end of the scene, it turned out that Hanabi and Konohamaru weren't the only ones unconscious.

"HINATA-CHAN?"

* * *

. . . The boxers bit was really random XD


	3. SasuSaku, DIE ITACHI DIE!

**Title:** DIE ITACHI DIE! ...oh wait, not _yet._  
**Author:** Strings of a Puppet  
**Pairing:** SasuSaku  
**Genre:** Humour  
**Disclaimer: **I do not own Naruto. Crackish. Written before current manga events.  
**Summary:** 'Is there a reason to let a merciless, cold-blooded killer live? Hmm, JUST MAYBE!'

* * *

The air was still and the mountain scenery was fitting for the final Uchiha showdown. Two pairs of Sharingan eyes steadily stared into the depths of twin red and black in an very hostile manner.

"Itachi."

"Sasuke."

The younger Uchiha glared at Itachi's lack of expression. "You're going to die today."

"We'll see, foolish little brother," replied Itachi as they both moved into their fighting stances, ready to end this once and for all.

"Sasuke-kun!"

A whine caused the Uchihas to break the glaring contest as Sasuke momentarily froze, thinking it was Karin. _What was she doing here?_ He hadn't seen her in years, but what emerged from their left was a pink haired woman. _Sakura?_

She was panting as she came in clear view. Halfway reaching them, her expression turned serious as she slowed down to step over the various rocks on the ground. Her viridian orbs darted from one to the next in complete distress then she unexpectedly tripped. "Itai!"

Sasuke resisted the urge to sweatdrop. Dropping his fighting stance, he spoke, "Sakura, what are you doing here? Can't you see that I'm about to chidori Itachi's ass?"

Itachi scoffed at his little brother's arrogance while he scrutinized the familiar girl, who had began to sniffle with tears in her eyes.

"You hate me."

Sasuke mentally sighed. She was at it again. "How many times do I have to tell you—"

"You're yelling at me!"

"I'm not yelling—"

"YES YOU ARE!" He visibly cringed at her shriek and hoped that Itachi hadn't seen that. "Ever since I told you I was pregnant, you've been so cruel to me!" She sniffled (exaggeratedly) again and wiped her eyes using the back of her hand.

Itachi raised his eyebrow, analyzing the scene before him. "You got a girl pregnant at fifteen?"

Sasuke scowled. "I'm _eighteen_." Kami, didn't his brother pay _any_ attention to him?

Sakura was still on the ground, bawling. "You ruined my life! I'm going to be a mother at a young age! I have to face criticism from people and delay my plans for my future! Hell, you haven't even proposed, you bastard."

"Sakura—"

"What am I going to do when you act so moody and gloomy and on a murderous rampage?"

Sasuke and Itachi blinked.

"I mean, you weren't even there when I woke up!" she continued, "I was so _hungry!_"

Itachi smirked. So his brother played the role of a maid. Itachi was sure his parents would be turning in their graves at this particular moment. Though, it was a level higher from being the weakling.

"You eat too much," replied Sasuke carelessly.

She gasped and more tears began to gather in her eyes.

"You. Think. I'm. Fat."

Sasuke was getting a headache. He still had to kill his brother for Kami's sake! Why did she have to be in one of her barely intolerable moods during a time like this? He was sure she would be tired from…a-hem…last night's events and wouldn't wake until noon. Damn it, he knew he should've left some food so she'll take her time eating (che, yeah right, she ate like a vacuum!) before setting out to find him. "In a way…yes."

She wailed as the tears fell down her cheeks. It slightly bothered him (who was he kidding?) as he watched her but he had to sort out his priorities! Yet it didn't seem that she was going to stop anytime soon. Her sobs would be utterly distracting while he fought Itachi. Just as he opened his mouth to speak, he was beat to it.

"I think you're beautiful."

After this statement, it became eerily silent. Sakura blinked up at Itachi in wonder as Sasuke narrowed his eyes.

She hiccuped and wiped away the remaining tears. "You do?"

Itachi smirked sexily. "Yes."

"What the fuck do you think you're doing, Itachi?" said Sasuke angrily.

"I'm stating my honest opinion," answered Itachi and caused Sakura to blush.

The blush on her cheeks angered Sasuke more. How dare his brother flirt with _his_ woman!

"You're nicer than Sasuke-kun!" she said happily and gave him the smile that was RESERVED for Sasuke and Sasuke ONLY. Those mood changes were seriously affecting her brain. What the hell was she doing?

Sasuke prepared to show his ultimate death glare.

"And smarter!" continued Sakura ignoring Sasuke, "You're even hotter than him!"

Sasuke had to stop his jaw from dropping.

"Can I marry you instead?"

"Sakura, what the hell—"

Itachi interrupted him again. "I'll think about it."

Pure confusion was shown on her features as she stood up. "Think about it? Why?"

Said man in question scoffed as if it were the most obvious thing on the planet. "After all, you had sex with my brother and are carrying his child. Personally, I don't like having seconds."

Uh-oh. Sakura eyes turned into slits.

"Are you calling me a slut?"

Sasuke subconsciously took a step back.

Itachi, however, didn't take notice of the dangerous chakra Sakura was beginning to emit. "I'm saying that you were careless. Pregnant at fifteen—"

"I'M EIGHTEEN DAMNIT!" screamed Sakura and crossed her arms in a huff.

"Either way, you're both too young and stupid to care for a child. If I agreed on your proposal, technically I'll be the only adult caring for the child, including yourself and that is too much responsibility."

Her eye twitched as she bit down her lips. She tried to calm down but it didn't last. "And you're going to my baby's uncle? How dare you! You back-stabbing jackass!"

Itachi had the decency to look offended.

"I don't think I can trust you babysitting the baby while Sasuke-kun and I have other things to do!"

Itachi kept his composure though his face paled. Him? Babysitting? Trying to see the whole concept of that absurd idea was impossible, even in his Uchiha genius capacity.

Sasuke still was angry and became even angrier when Sakura had suggested that. This was ridiculous. "Who said he's going to live long enough to babysit?"

Sakura scoffed then turned her attention towards Sasuke. "Well, I don't _think_ you want Naruto to do it. He'll food poison OUR baby!"

That was true, Sasuke thought, the dobe and his disgusting ramen made him grimace. "Kakashi then."

"Have you lost your mind? I don't want my baby to grow up a pervert!"

"That blonde friend of yours…Yamanaka…"

"PIG? She'll glomp him to death!"

"Nara—"

"He falls asleep on the job!"

"The Godaime—"

"And what? She'll accidentally give him sake!"

"The female Hyuuga—"

"She has a name! Besides Hinata's expecting one of her own!"

"Your parents—"

"Oh, okay! That's a wonderful suggestion. Now, is that after YOU tell my parents you got me pregnant?"

Sasuke sighed and stood in silence as he repeatedly thought this through. There was the fact that he waited all these years just to prove to Itachi he was no longer a weakling. And there was the fact that if they had no one responsible enough, (it almost killed Sasuke to admit that Itachi had a good sense of responsibilty despite his insanity), to watch his future son, things were going to get complicated with Sakura.

"Itachi, it seems I can't kill you yet."

"What?" blinked the older Uchiha and finally took a step back.

"We'll continue this, let's say about seven years later, when my son is old enough to take care of himself."

Suddenly, Sakura approached Sasuke and hit him. Sasuke looked absolutely insulted that she would dare hit him in front of his brother. He still had to keep up his manly reputation!

"You IDIOT! You said you wanted at least TEN KIDS!"

"That's right." Sasuke muttered and massaged his shoulder. He remembered telling her that the first time they had sex (it was better to tell her his expectations before she ran away or something). "Then by the time they all grow up…"

Itachi's normal pale complexion went down a few considerable shades.

Sakura smiled happily. Her bad mood was gone, which was a relief to Sasuke. He wanted things to go perfectly afterwards because the initial plan was to propose to her after Itachi's deserving and painful death. But since that wasn't happening, he still needed her to be in a good mood, not that she would refuse (scoff, who would reject him?) his proposal, but because it was a moment she had been waiting for her whole life (and for more sex on his part).

"It's all planned then!" said Sakura as she rubbed her belly, "Aw, wouldn't it be cute when they call him Itachi-ojisan?"

As the couple conversed—Sakura was the one talking while Sasuke just nodded (wondering how the sex would be like when they were 'official')—Itachi panicked.

"Oh shit."

* * *

**TBC**

_A/N: Obviously, crack isn't my strong point. _


	4. SasuSaku, Manhandling?

******Title:** Manhandling? That's such a strong word for this situation.**  
****Author:** Strings of a Puppet**  
****Pairing:** SasuSaku**  
****Genre:** Humour/Romance**  
****Disclaimer: **I do not own Naruto.

* * *

"Stop manhandling me!"

"I am not manhandling you."

"Then release me."

"I don't think so."

Before the manhandled-ee could continue whining, there was a misstep and the sound of a loud crash. Accused eyes glared up and hissed, "You. Dropped. Me."

"You clearly told me to let go."

"You did that on purpose."

"If you weren't so stubborn, that wouldn't have happened."

"If _you_ weren't such a man handler—"

Said accused person tried to grab onto sprawled limbs and pull the ultra-sensitive whiner up, but there was another misstep, which caused both to land onto the floor with a second crash.

"—and now you're trying to squish me!"

"For Kami's sake, Sasuke! Quit whining and get in the bathtub before all the bubbles disappear!"

The dark-haired narrowed his eyes at the constant demands and crossed his arms in defiance before glaring at the pink-head above him. "You have strange sexual fantasies."

She smiled mischievously and stood up again. "What can I say? You're my husband and I have every right to spank you!"

"Sakura, you're taking this dominatrix thing too far," he stated while remembering the force she used on him with the whip last night. Sure it was _nice_ on some level, but goddamn it! It HURT. Not that he would admit it.

She gave him an angry look. "That's it Uchiha. Turn around now!"

"No. We had enough spanking, Sakura."

"There is no such thing as having enough spanking! It's highly enjoyable! And it makes one feel absolutely invincible!"

_Why can't I use the whip on her for once?_ He thought to himself but already knew the answer to that. Using a whip on a female would bring disastrous consequences and he would be handcuffed...on a bed _by_ Sakura, who would cry about abusing husbands and the pure injustice of women being treated like animals or sex objects.

"Don't make me repeat myself, Uchiha!" she said warningly before rolling up her sleeves.

_Oh shit._ She was planning on using her bare hands, which hurt even more than the whip! Subconsciously, he gulped as he tried to remember the reason why he was putting up with this absurd, not to mention humiliating, atrocity.

Well, the _reason_ was standing right in front of him, but was that really enough to give up his pride in complete surrender?

He started to feel a bit chilly—he was only wearing boxers after all—as he watched her raise her eyebrow in expectance. Only she would have him in a situation like this. Of course, even back when they were kids, he knew she was particularly bossy but not to this extreme. Who knew innocent little Sakura-chan was such a sexual sadist?

Yet, she was the only one that he would allow to something like this quite honestly.

He sighed and tried not to wince.

But whatever his logic was telling him, he was _not_ being manhandled by a short pink-haired woman (a.k.a THE WIFE) clad in his baggy clothes.

He—

SMACK!

—really—

SLAP!

—wasn't!

* * *

_A/N: Short...but sweet? I'm so lameeee! Hehe. Much love!_


	5. NaruHina, It's called a bridal lift

******Title:** It's called a "bridal lift"**  
****Author:** Sakura x Kisu**  
****Pairing:** NaruHina**  
****Genre:** Mainly humour, hints**  
****Disclaimer: **I don't own Naruto.

* * *

"Ow!" Naruto yelled when his back scraped harshly against the rough wall.

"N-Naruto-KUN…" Hinata accidentally yelled the suffix when her knees grazed roughly against the wall of the narrow hallway, "C-Could YOU please b-be more genTLE!" She yelled the last syllable when her shins hit the wall.

"Gomen Hinat-OW!" Naruto yelled when he felt his elbows scraped against the wall, a stinging pain throbbing in his elbows, as Hinata jumped and screamed from the surprise of hearing Naruto yell.

"I-It's FINE!" Hinata accidentally screamed into Naruto's ear, causing him to wince and jump abruptly. This simple act managed to trigger something that would most likely scar their marriage.

Naruto stumbled around the hallway, as his senses became tinged with light-headedness-and the fact that Hinata's arms were wound so tightly around his neck that the air was steadily restricting didn't help much either.

"H-H-Hinata….L-Let go…" Naruto stammered, his voice hoarse and hardly audible, as his naturally healthy looking face was slowly draining of it's colour and in turn was changing to a wonderful hue of…

…seasick green.

Overwhelmed by light-headedness and the lack of oxygen to his head, Naruto staggered around the hallway, thus causing both him and Hinata to continue to bump into the narrow walls, his footsteps erratic instead of his usual exact steps. His vision was deteriorating drastically, as he continued to literally trip over thin air.

"N-Naruto-KUN! A-Are you al-OW!" She couldn't help but let out a cry of pain when her shins collided against the wall, as Naruto whimpered-Hinata had literally screamed straight into his ear.

"Whoa, whoa, WHOA-" Naruto's stammering was replaced by the sound of his screams, as his footing had become so erratic that he was falling to the ground-the resonance of Hinata's high pitched screams melded with Naruto's, as they fell down together…

…Hinata landing on top of Naruto, thus creating an unruly mess and landing the newlyweds in a rather…frisky position.

'…Fuck…' Was the first word that entered Naruto's thoughts when he felt Hinata's slim thigh brush accidentally against a rather…_erogenous_ area of his body.

(_he took this moment to wonder whether Hinata had done it on purpose or was she a hormonal-driven Hyuuga, just like her cousin Neji was, especially around Tenten, what with all the frisky rumours_)

Naruto immediately brushed away these thoughts-there was no way Hinata was that sort of girl-Hinata was no Sakura or Ino.

(_he'd been slightly scared of Sakura when he had heard the rumours of what she had been up to at night with Sasuke-heck he even pitied the poor Uchiha when he heard of the spanking. And as for Ino…well, she was another story completely-he didn't even want to imagine what she and Shikamaru had done_)

Hinata was innocent, shy, quiet, reserved, cute-

(_and rather redfaced_)

-all in all, Hinata was just…_Hinata_.

He gazed up at her face from impulse, taking in the sight of her face as though this was the first time he had properly looked at Hinata.

(_and he noted to himself-what a bright shade of red-just like on the day of the wedding, when Hanabi was wearing her…wedding…dress…, he inwardly shook his head, brushing away all thoughts of the rather eventful wedding day_)

"A-Ano…N-Naruto-kun," Hinata mumbled, bringing her index fingers together, poking the digits together in a familiar habit-the heat continued to rush to her face, as she diverted her gaze away from Naruto, lowering her eyelashes.

"..Ah! Gomen, Hinata-chan," Naruto immediately slid out from underneath Hinata, letting out a nervous laugh and brushing a shaky hand through his sunshine blond mesh of hair.

(_and he could only wonder in astonishment, how he, "Uzumaki I'm-the-apprentice-of-the-author-of-icha-icha-paradise-meaning-I'm-a-perv Naruto", would even be capable of sleeping in the same bed as Hyuuga Hinata, let alone _bed _her)_

_

* * *

_

**TBC**

**A/N: dun dun dun! **

…

…

**So. I (finally) submitted a oneshot. It should be continued. So, a new follow-up to this should be up, soon(ish). Yeah, it maybe really short, but…ah well! Anyways, review please!**


	6. SasuSaku, In Laws

******Title:** "in-laws"**  
****Author:** Strings of a Puppet**  
****Pairing:** SasuSaku**  
****Genre:** Humour**  
****Disclaimer: **I do not own Naruto. Slight OOC. Written before current manga events.**  
****Summary:** 'If all else fails, there's ALWAYS someone to talk to! ..._Yeah, right._'

* * *

Uchiha-san,

It is to my great embarrassment that I'm reaching out to you with a personal problem (that shouldn't EVEN be a problem) and ask you...well...for **advice.** But you are the infamous Uchiha (my husband is second, but don't worry, once you're dead, he'll be number one like he very much is in my heart!) and his older brother so you must know about his (cough) childish antics more than I do.

Truthfully, I am tired of his behavior and want him to understand that he can't ignore me anymore like he used to when we were Genin! I am his wife (I still get butterflies when I say that!) and he should tell me about his problems! But like the arrogant idiot that he is (I love him anyway), he won't and tells me (I quote) "It is none of your concern."

HOW COULD IT NOT BE ANY OF MY CONCERN!

He's the one who always looks so gloomy and emo! Is it so bad that all I want do is to HELP him? I am THE WIFE! I'm supposed to care for him and be there when he needs someone to comfort when he has nightmares. (Thanks to you bastard! It's YOUR fault that my manly Sasuke-kun screams like a little girl in his sleep!) BUT he won't say a WORD to me!

I know that maybe he's trying to keep that tough act around me, but what can I do to make him understand that I'm not going to betray (unlike you did, asshole) or laugh at him? I would very much appreciate any words of advice.

-Uchiha (there'll be more in record time, just you wait, BUT STAY AWAY, and see!) Sakura.

* * *

**Sakura-san,** (I refuse to acknowledge you as an Uchiha and I'll make sure no little Uchihas pop out of you)

Before I reply to your...interesting letter, I must warn you first.

Never again use pink paper and green ink. It was a horrible sight for my eyes to take in. Though, it was useful for me to remember who you are. However, all those pathetic excuses for hearts were not necessary. Grow up, it's degrading.

So you married my brother. I pity you. He is not yet strong enough to defeat me (I highly doubt that he will) and he has already settled down? This alone should be proof that nothing good will come from this marriage. He's too preoccupied with his revenge to give attention to anything else, including you. He was always a weak child that hid behind his mother's skirts. Don't you find yourself questioning whether he's strong enough to protect you?

His refusal to not let anyone know of his emotions is because he was taught to be that way. Why do you think I got rid of all the Uchiha clan? It is the only way he could summon his balls and stop being such a weakling. (His nightmares are necessary so he'll always remember his goal. A little girl, you say? I knew something like that would happen after he was "accidentally" dressed up in a kimono with yellow flowers in his hair when he was younger.) He will not be dependent on others, therefore, I'm not going to help you in this matter.

In short, you brought this on yourself. You want words of advice? Get out of it while you still can.

(That means no waiting to birth Uchihas)

**-Uchiha (I will be the last one standing) Itachi.**

**

* * *

**

Inconsiderate Weasel,

HOW DARE YOU! I risked my reputation and life (Sasuke-kun will kill me if he found out I'm writing to you) to ask you for simple advice! I love my Sasuke-kun more than anything and I will help him in every way possible! If that means hunting you down myself to make him happy, then I WILL!

No matter what you say, I'm an Uchiha. I went through the whole wedding crap so I DESERVE some respect! And you CAN'T STOP me from birthing future Uchihas! Sasuke-kun and I make love at least twice a day! ...WITHOUT PROTECTION! Haha. Take that! (In fact, I may be pregnant at the moment...my monthly cycle is late. Hmm, I should talk to Tsunade-shishou tomorrow, just in case.)

Sasuke-kun IS strong! And he's getting stronger everyday! He WILL defeat you! (gasp) NOTHING good will result from my marriage? Screw you! What do you know? He doesn't think about you all the time! Conceited bastard! And as much as I know he **can** protect me, I don't need anyone's protection! I am a very capable kunoichi with medic skills that surpasses the Godaime's! (I am her apprentice after all.) Not to mention I could kill you with a touch of MY FOREFINGER!

Oh yeah, sure. SOME OLDER BROTHER YOU ARE! Killing the whole clan (AND SHE WAS YOUR MOTHER TOO!) to 'summon his balls'? My Sasuke-kun has enough balls, bastard! He was only eight years old! How the hell was he supposed to protect them all? He blames himself for that and it absolutely pains me! Because of you, he might be developing a serious mental disorder! One psycho Uchiha is enough! (But, uh...do you maybe have a photo of Sasuke-kun in that cute kimono?)

Bleh. I brought this on myself? This is YOUR ENTIRE FAULT! I will not leave Sasuke-kun. He **NEEDS** me.

And are you insulting my taste in color? Those hearts I drew were adorable, so shut up. Wait, are you insulting my appearance? I can't HELP that I'm this way!

So I hope these COLORS BLIND YOU! Ha, I should thank Naruto for giving me yellow paper and orange ink on my birthday! (though I have no idea why he gave me that!)

-**Uchiha** Sakura

* * *

(Giving out rude nicknames are we? Very well then.)

**Frail and Average Cherry Blossom,**

I do not care that you're putting yourself at risk by contacting me. I am his older brother but that doesn't mean I'll help you with his emo-ness. In fact, there is nothing wrong with being emo on occasion. It is normal for one to have thoughts of suicide or murder.

Tsk. Love? You will soon see that love you supposedly feel for him is useless. Love isn't enough. It isn't even a strong emotion compared to hate. Hate is what drives people to succeed. Love is what drowns them. So you'll be the only one suffering because I can guarantee that he does not feel the same towards you.

I did not need to know how intimate you both are with each other. He's using you to restore the clan (which will never happen) and it is unfortunate that you think it's because of something else. If you are pregnant, I will have to pay a visit to Konoha soon. Like I said, I will not permit any birthing of Uchihas.

My foolish little brother is weak. Orochimaru's death proves nothing. With or without the use of his arms, he was as weak as otouto. And you are the same. You may possess inhuman strength but you're very slow in executing your moves. Perhaps instead of sleeping with my brother, you should train.

It was necessary to eliminate the clan. I held no bonds with any of them. That was why I was the strongest of them all. Age is only a number. I was a chunin at five and Anbu Captain at thirteen. Sasuke was pathetic at that age. He could've done more than cry and beg for his life. So he should continue to blame himself. And if it means losing his mind to power, so be it. And I am not psychotic. (Sasuke destroyed that photo when he was six, I believe.)

Again, Sasuke does not need anyone. If you pose as a serious interference, then I will have to eliminate you as well. It's so easy to walk away. Why don't you ask Sasuke? He left the village without caring about how you felt.

Your choice in color is atrocious, though the orange and yellow are slightly better than the pink and green. Those hearts of yours lacked perfect symmetry.

**-Uchiha Itachi**

* * *

BASTARD UCHIHA!

I am NOT frail or average! It was an appropriate nickname for you bastard! And you better start using 'Uchiha' when you address me! I didn't bold it in my signature for nothing! And if you didn't see that, then you definitely must be blind! You had it coming!

It is NOT normal for one to have thoughts like that! Just because you have them does not apply to the rest of us SANE people! ...for the most part...

You are an emotionless, cruel bastard! You know nothing about love so don't question the love I feel for Sasuke-kun! (SCOFF) "Love is what drowns them"? Are you trying to be poetic? Because you SUCK AT IT! And he DOES feel the same way! He tells me so **every time** WE finish (or during...it's hard to tell with my screaming) making LOVE! He was shy at first to say it. You have no idea how sexy and romantic he is when he whispers it in my ear. Oh, you must be wondering if I'm pregnant or not...

Brace yourself bastard...

...I AM!

And if you dare come to Konoha, you're going to have to face the WHOLE village that supports my marriage to Sasuke-kun! (I'm guessing it's because they want an Uchiha army someday!) Besides, no one likes you anyway. It's a lose-lose situation for you.

Go out and train instead? **WELL,** the way Sasuke and I are in our love-making, it's so much more **intensifying** and **satisfying** than some kunai practice! I'm slow? You're the CHEATER WITH YOUR SHARINGAN! You're only fast because you have to keep running away since you don't have any other abilities! Besides, _a-hem_, if no one has broken the news to you, I helped bring down an Akatsuki member myself! The baby doll-faced puppeteer (although he was evil and all, he was the cutest of the crazy bunch!) was amazed with my abilities!

If Orochimaru was so weak, WHY DIDN'T YOU KILL HIM? It would have saved me the trouble from being lonely and chasing Sasuke around when he went to the snake pedophile (weren't you the least bit concerned over what he could have done to Sasuke-kun?) to go after you! And he did care! He thanked me! (I still don't know exactly for what, but who cares? It's not a common thing he does!) Everything is your fault bastard!

Don't you threaten me! If it comes down to it, I will interfere in this sibling rivalry that you WILL lose!

Well, that explains it. You had no childhood. That is why you're crazy psycho. Don't try to deny it. You must have felt **something** for your parents. One does not forget a mother's touch! (Oh, crap! He destroyed it? That's okay! I'll just dress up my own mini Sasuke in a cute kimono!)

You're wrong. Sasuke does need me. All humans need companionship. You should understand. Kisame-san must be...pleasant company to you, huh?

I knew you would like the orange and yellow. You can't keep Naruto off your mind, sick bastard! Lacked perfect symmetry? YOU'RE CLOSE TO BLIND! How would you know?

-UCHIHA SAKURA

* * *

**Delusional Blossom,**

Women are frail and emotional. That is a fact. Accept it.

While I admit my eyesight isn't as it used to be, I am not blind. I decided to ignore the bold print but those terrible hearts were impossible to overlook.

It is normal. After all, there are insane people in the world.

On the contrary, I do know about love, but it is a ridiculous emotion, so I do not bother with it. I was not trying to be poetic. I was making a point that you apparently did not understand.

Tsk. He only tells you that to keep you coming for more. He wants to restore his clan. He doesn't give a damn about you. Your pregnancy will be a hindrance. I will have to come for you despite having to fight Konoha forces.

Do not mention any further details of your sex life. I will not tolerate unnecessary images. The only way to determine your speed is when I come and rid of your pregnancy.

Sasori had a weakness for his puppets and pretty girls. I did not kill Orochimaru because he was not worth the effort like my foolish brother was, (who also has Sharingan, why aren't you accusing him of having the same as I?) and from what I heard, his departure made you take yourself seriously. If you leave him now, you'll get even stronger and discover your full abilities.

No, I did not care what Orochimaru did to him during those years.

You should feel threatened, Sakura-san. Sometimes, you forget who you're speaking with. You interfere, you'll be eliminated.

I must, however, agree that I did not experience a 'childhood.' Yet this doesn't determine my mental stability. All I felt for them were contempt. The woman who Sasuke calls mother never touched me. (You won't be dressing any child up. Besides, you should consider wearing more suitable female clothing.)

Sasuke needs more power, not you. It is insulting that you would suggest inappropriate innuendos between Kisame and me.

I do not like that you keep calling me a bastard. I am not one. I was given birth by two married people unlike your unborn (and it will stay that way) child. I am not convinced that you are an Uchiha and are probably some obsessed fangirl pretending to be Sasuke's wife.

By the way, I will have to come for Naruto someday. Ideally, the same day I get rid of that child in your womb.

**-Uchiha Itachi**

**

* * *

**

Mr. I'm-almost-blind Uchiha,

Your responses are becoming vague(er). That will not do. Women are emotional, but strong! They control themselves better than a majority of men. And hello? The Godaime is a female! It's kind of hard to miss those knockers even with your eyes! Plus, there's a thing called e-q-u-a-l-i-t-y. Accept that, Mr. kiss-the-ground-I'm-walking-on asshole.

I don't have time to respond to every stupid thing you said (Sasuke-kun's in the shower and I plan on joining him soon! Mm, the water droplets fall down his perfect, pale skin so teasingly!) But know this...

...YOU TRY TO COME AFTER MY BABY I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU!

I don't give a damn that you're Itachi. Mess with a mother and you're getting a (quicker) ticket to hell!

No wonder your mother didn't touch you. WTF! More suitable female clothing? My outfits are kick ass!

Sasuke has a move on of his own! Chidori! What do you say to that?

Whatever. But Kisame is the only one you're with all the time. It's **normal** to assume things, right?

I am not pretending to be Sasuke's wife. As proof, I attached a copy of our marriage certificate. Maybe now you'll address me with my PROPER name!

(Did you just call me pretty?)

-Uchiha Sakura

* * *

**Kunoichi,**

There is no such thing as equality. The women I have come across can barely contain themselves when they catch a glimpse of me. Of course, I am aware that the Godaime is a female. In fact, you mirror her in several aspects. You're both monstrous and slug friendly.

The marriage certificate is just a piece of paper. To be a true Uchiha, the bride has to be accepted by the members of the clan. Seeing as they have perished, I am the only one who can approve this marriage.

I do not approve. You're engaging in a simple affair with my brother and that child is a mere bastard. That is why it is better that I rid of it.

I will no longer respond to anything that deals with my past, nor any of the idiotic implications over Kisame.

If I recall, Kakashi-san taught Sasuke that. He did not create it on his own.

And I told you not to mention your sex life.

(Uchihas have taste. You must have met some standards if Sasuke chose you.)

**-U. Itachi**

**

* * *

**

Murderous Sleep Deprived Crow,

Heh, I bet women are wilder over my Sasuke-kun than you! That's all you can come up with? Monstrous and slug friendly? Tsunade-sama and I have more in common than you know! (since she's my mentor and all) AND ha, I will have that exact chest since I'm pregnant now! I'm getting a noticeable bulge and my breasts are literally aching! (I must say though, Sasuke's tongue is quite soothing so I'm not exactly complaining.)

Are you perhaps a bit upset we didn't invite you to the wedding ceremony? Then maybe YOU COULD HAVE SEEN WITH YOUR OWN EYES (not that it will help much) THAT SASUKE-KUN AND I WERE MARRIED UNDER KONOHA LAW IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE (it mainly consisted of Sasuke-kun's fanclub...I still can't believe they all wore BLACK!) POPULATION OF THE VILLAGE!

You know what? I **dare** you to come down here and TRY IT! You will not harm my baby! Aren't you the least bit compassionate? It's your future nephew or niece! Better yet, it could be twins! Or triplets! WHO KNOWS?

Fine, be a baby (total pun intended) and run away from your past.

You're just jealous that you can't (well...maybe you can, YOU COPIER) have lightning bolts coming from your hand. Worried that it would chip your pretty purple nails?

It's my sex life and I will share it with anyone I CHOOSE!

(Ha, not so blind to my beauty, huh?)

-Uchiha (when are you gonna recognize?) Sakura

* * *

**Sakura-san,**

I have missions to complete. I do not have time to reply to your wasteful statements. This has clearly gone out of context and I do not like wasting my time. We'll discuss the issue with your false marriage in person in the near future.

Do not even suggest the number of Uchihas possible.

I do not run.

Chidori is not that impressive. I did manage to snap his wrist without a scratch.

Your sex life is probably not that exciting, which could be the reason why you mention it repeatedly.

To end this, I will give you that wanted advice from the beginning.

Stick a pole up my foolish brother's ass.

**-U. Itachi**

**

* * *

**

Itachi-san,

In that case, I WILL BE WAITING TO PROVE YOU WRONG!

I HAVE to prepare! What if I do end up with triplets? Do you know how many diapers I'm going to have to buy (technically with your money but Sasuke inherited it ALL) and change?

MY SEX LIFE **IS **GREAT!

And finally, some advice...but,

HE ALREADY HAS IT UP HIS ASS!

-Sakura Uchiha (What? Are you so embarrassed that you can't write out your full name anymore?)

* * *

**Sakura-san,**

I will look forward to that meeting as well.

You wouldn't have to worry about that if you miscarry. If it's money you want, take it all and get an abortion.

If you say so.

True.

**-U. Itachi**

**

* * *

**

The inconsiderate weasel is back,

That's all you have to say? You're utterly boring. It's better if you keep your mysterious aura and the silent act so people will keep being afraid (or keep thinking you're smexy) of you. Seriously.

I will not miscarry or get an abortion! And any more comments like that, I'll be kneeing you in the groin when you decide to visit! How lovely!

I do say so. 'Cause, it's oh so great. You wouldn't know, since Sasuke told me you were probably asexual a.k.a MALE VIRGIN!

True? How is that going to help me?

-The FEMALE Uchiha

* * *

**Sakura-san,**

I'll keep that in mind.

**-Uchiha Itachi**

**

* * *

**

Boring Weasel,

You're not HELPING ME AT ALL!

-Uchiha Sakura (...have you noticed the nice ring to it by now?)

* * *

**Annoying Flower,**

If you haven't noticed, I could care less about your marriage problems with my foolish little brother.

**-U. Itachi**

**

* * *

**

Uncreative Blind Weasel-sama,

(Scoff) Well, that's too bad. If I'm unhappy, Sasuke-kun's unhappy. And when he's unhappy, all that is on his mind are thoughts of coming after you! Surely you're sick of him annoying you like this right? I might encourage him to go after you this time!

-Mrs. Uchiha Sakura

* * *

**Needy Little Girl,**

So now you're threatening me, kunoichi. Don't think that this will work on me.

However, my patience is waning profoundly. You want his attention? You want him to talk to you about his problems? Then refuse to have sex with him and that is all.

I do not wish to hear from you again.

U.C.H.I.H.A S.A.K.U.R.A

**-Uchiha (that name will change) Itachi**

**

* * *

**

ARIGATO ITACHI-NIISAN!

It worked like a charm.

See? (metaphorically speaking) It wasn't difficult to help out a person in need! You should do that more often. (gasp) You should be a therapist! The glasses would suit you! (You desperately need them anyway.)

Fine, I won't BOTHER you with my marriage anymore because it's greater than ever. I think you SAVED it! But hey, perhaps you need some love advice! (you didn't deny being a virgin!) Kisame seems to be uptight all the time. What on earth are you doing to him? Be gentle—

* * *

Itachi ripped up the letter and proceeded to burn it into a crisp.


	7. NaruHina, Threaten the blond !

**Title: **Yeah and while you're at it, threaten the blonde (!)

**Author:** Sakura x Kisu

**Pairing: **NaruHina

**Genre: **Humour/SLIGHT romance

**Summary:** Hyuuga Neji and Hyuuga Hiashi were well known for their overprotective behaviour. But, how far could they really go until the shurikens needed to be taken out?

* * *

"_Damn_!" 19 year-old Uzumaki Naruto remarked, clearly shocked by his appearance.

His usually spiky, dishevelled blonde hair was gelled back, a slight flick at the back.

His usual orange shirt and blue jeans were currently replaced by a black, sleek tuxedo, the neckline of white shirt underneath the black jacket a little too high up for his liking.

But, even if he hated his hair being gelled back and high necklines, he couldn't help but admit it – that he looked pretty good in a tuxedo.

He turned around for the umpteenth time, viewing his body in the mirrors around him, his lips positioned into a small "o".

"Naruto," Even after the stern voice of his fiancé's cousin calling to him, he continued to spin around in a circle.

"_Naruto_," However, as soon as he heard the sterner voice of his fiance's father, he stopped immediately, taking a few steps back from dizziness.

"Y–Yes, Hiashi-san," Even though he would never admit it face-to-face, Naruto was scared.

Well, more like, intimidated – yes, he was intimidated by Hyuuga Hiashi. Though Hyuuga Neji could be slightly daunting at times, Hyuuga Hiashi was….well, even if you didn't want to, you'd automatically respect him, probably out of fear.

"Naruto, I need to talk to you," Hiashi stated in monotone.

"So do I," Neji added, also in monotone. Naruto nodded, gulping audibly, as he waited for them to continue.

"Naruto," Hiashi began, deciding to take huge strides around the shaking blonde boy, "Do you know why I let Hinata marry you?"

"N–No, Hiashi-san," Naruto stammered, trying to keep his voice normal.

Hiashi stopped walking around him, and stopped in front of him.

"Because she deserves happiness," He stated sharply, Neji nodding approvingly behind Hiashi.

Naruto gulped again, before nodding with the two of them.

And, after at least a few more seconds of nodding, Hiashi continued to speak.

"So, Naruto, if **[you] **ever, _ever_ decide to be…adulterous, know this; you will **not** get out of this marriage unscathed," Hiashi stated, his voice possessing a murderous tone to it.

"Yes, I repeat; You will not get out of this marriage unscathed," Neji repeated, nodding his head unison with Hiashi.

Naruto gulped for the umpteenth time, before nodding along with them.

They spent a few more seconds nodding, until Hiashi left the room, Neji following him loyally.

And, the moment the door was slammed shut, Naruto let out a long sigh.

"God," Naruto began, loosening the first few buttons of his shirt and running a hand through his head, regardless of the fact that his hand was covered in hairgel and that he'd have to gel his hair back again.

"I never knew Neji could be such a kiss-ass."


End file.
